The mega movie, ‘Dasavatharam’, made the right headlines, caught hold of the fancy of fringe hindu groups who filed suits in the courts of India, thus increasing the advertisement for the film more than any thing else done by the directors and promoters of the movie.Well, let us look at the movie, its story line ( I am assuming that it had one ) and the different make-ups donned by Kamal, without any bias or fear or favour or having the necessity to be politically correct.
The initial characterization, that of the Vaishnavite Rangarajan Nambi – did that have anything to do with the main story line excepting giving Kamal a chance for another makeup, Asin, the heroine, another role of a cry-baby and Napolean a chance to sit on an elephant and of course the Lord Ranganatha or Govindaraja, a chance to measure the depths of the Bay of Bengal ?
Let us not go into the storyline, for, if we do so, we would have to look at many questions as to why did Bipasha Basu come up all of a sudden just to die hanging over a hook, having been fixed there by an elephant, what was the earth shaking activity that the tall Muslim guy perform in the movie to add value to the overall effort to save the planet from extinction, etc. Hence let us look at some of the more pristine and more earthly acts performed by the Lord Govindarajan, the Uthsavar of Chidambaram Temple and investigate as to why gods from other religions are not able to perform such acts.
Notwithstanding the fact that the Lord had the Sudarshan Chakra in His hand, He was not able to defend himself from being buried inside deep sand in a burial ground or help himself from being hurled around from a moving train to the sand pits of the river Cauvery. That is a question that one has to ask Him. Probably that would be explained in a ‘rational’ manner by the ever erudite Kamal in a forthcoming movie.
Wait a minute. Did I say Lord Govindarajan ? To err is human and hence I have erred. To forgive is divine and hence He would forgive me. My God, when did Shri Govindaraja Perumal become a member of the British House of Lords?
The incredible acrobatics performed by the Lord , the infinite patience exhibited by Him while sleeping in an ice box and the ability to use the CIA-assasin as a Garuda Vahana while moving from one under-construction building to the other, the capability to remain in equilibrium even when moving in and out of the toilet in the hands of the ever-shouting-at-the-top-of-her-voice heroine, and the normal gravity defying gliding acts performed by Him while falling into the old boat on the sea-shore – amazing acts performed by the good Lord Govindaraja.
Kudos, Lord.
But despite the praises on my Lord, what is wrong with the other Gods ? Why aren’t they called to perform such aerobics ? Why are people from the semitic religions not called to perform the lead actress roles where in the practices of the semitic followers could be called into question as has been done with the practices and speech patterns of hindus in general and brahmins in particular?
Kudos to Asin too, the ever shouting heroine, for her adept handling of the ‘Perumal’ in one hand all through the film. Every wart knows that the idols ( historically old ones and ‘Panchaloha ‘ ones in that ) are too heavy to be lifted with a single hand that too by the slim and undernourished Brahmin girl ‘Andal’ played by Asin. Hence the Tamil Nadu government could consider sending her for the Olympics in place of Karnam Malleswari.
Now that Govind Naicker has been depicted as an NRI scientist with more American accent than even the American assassin and the pitiable Brahmins still in the by-lanes of Chidambaram performing ‘irrational’ religious rituals, could we declare that ‘social-justice’ has been achieved and therefore communal reservation could be done away with? Probably this is an ‘illogical’ question as opposing communal reservation is akin to doubting the antecedents of EVR himself and that is ‘rationalism’ in full flow, for the un-initiated.
Last night there was a divine visitation from the Lord. He had some poignant questions to me. I need to present those to the readers so that they could help me answer them. Please understand that I am not gifted with the kind of erudition that the tamil film makers, personified by Kamal, have been gifted with.
Here are the questions that the Lord asked me:
“
1. Why was I made to play the role without any call-sheet having been signed ?
2. Why did I need to perform the acrobatics along with the heroes ( note the plural here ) when I am not qualified even to be the owner of my own temples in your state ?
3. Why is nobody talking about My rights to live in peace at my temple premises while my equivalents in other religions are left free to pursue their own activities in their own abodes ?
4. Why am I scolded for the ‘tsunami’ when the supposedly equally powerful gods of the other pantheons ( of the semitic kind ) have also been equally responsible by their inaction during the disaster ?
5. I don’t remember fathoming the depths of the Bay of Bengal during the 12th century when I was busy making people knowledgeable by preparing them for the onslaught by the semitic religions. That being the case, why am I depicted as a deep sea diver during the start of the film ? BTW, what is this 12th Century ? Do you know that the time span that you are talking about is just a spec of dust in the overall cosmic life time ?
6. Why was the Vedanta Desika Matam targeted this time as also the venerable Azhagiya Singar ? In fact Kamal had used the pictures of the Azhagiya Singars in the film too. Did they authorize the use of the saintly pictures ? ( For your information , the term ‘Azhagiya Singar’ was sanctioned by me to the early peetadhipathis of the Ahobila Mutt that was started 610 years ago. That, in turn, signified me as myself in the Narasimha Avatar).
7. Do you want me to start my 10th Avatar ( Kalki Avatar ) any time soon ? The way things are happening in your world, I feel, it is time for me to start my last avatar of this cosmic life cycle. Probably that is why you guys have started the global warming and thereby invited my wrath.
” Rationally, I didn’t have answers for the questions posed.